When It’s Not About You

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I’ve talked in the past about how we as parents can have a huge influence over our child’s moods. When we wake up feeling grumpy, that can have a huge effect on our child’s well being. They reflect our mood back to us ten fold and we find ourselves in a negative cycle which can be really tough to break out of.

But what about when you wake up feeling wonderful and your child still isn’t happy?

Are you to blame?

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How to Let Go of Guilt as a Parent

This is a subject I feel so strongly about. Guilt is something we all experience at some point in our parenting journey. In this video I share why we need to let that go for the sake of ourselves and our children, and how we can start doing that.

You Can Watch The Video Here!

 

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How (And Why) I Night Weaned My Three Year Old With No Tears

We have had some huge changes to our breastfeeding relationship in the last 12 months. This time last year Little Cat was coming up for three years old, and was breastfeeding every twenty to thirty minutes through the day, and around 6-8 times during the night.

Then I was bitten by a tick on a walk in the woods in August, and developed symptoms of Lyme disease. This resulted in a three week course of antibiotics which had a dramatic effect on my ability to feed my son and caused me a lot of pain, which I eventually discovered was down to ductal thrush. It was 8 months before I discovered the cause of the pain, and during that time I had little choice but to start limiting feeds quite dramatically and make them much shorter than we were used to.

I did it as gently as possible and my empathetic three year old worked with me to get through the pain by accepting his less frequent feeds with grace and understanding. It was during this time that he began waking just 2-3 times at night for milk. He even went a few nights with no milk at all, and I started to get more sleep for the first time in many years.

Something which my body didn’t want to give up lightly.

So when I found the answer to my painful breasts and treated the ductal thrush, it came as quite a shock to find that Little cat began to steadily increase his feeds once again. It wasn’t long before he was waking every hour or more through the night for milk. If I refused or even asked him to stop after a long feed, he would scream and scream, becoming more angry than I have ever seen him.

Before the thrush, I coped just fine with these frequent wakings. My body had learned to adapt. But now that I had had a taste of what being rested felt like, giving it up to go back to all night feeding was not so easy.

I began to struggle with my patience during the day. I was snappy and unmotivated. I didn’t want to talk, to go to the park, to play – I just wanted to lay on the sofa and read and rest. I was struggling, and my parenting was too.

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Hate Me Now, Thank Me Later – Inspiring Excerpts and Review

When I saw this book in the library I must admit the title didn’t make me think of natural or gentle parenting. However, I am so glad I picked it up. It has really surprised me!

Find out why in this new video:

Watch The Video Here!

 

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Why Are We So Afraid of Attachment?

“So you’re still breastfeeding him?”
“Yep.”
“And he’s nearly four?”
“Yep.”
“And did I hear you say he sleeps in your bed too?”
“You might have done.”
“Oh my. You know, you have to let him go at some point. It’s just not healthy to keep him smothered like that. It’s not good for him! And I dread to imagine the state of your marriage!”

Did the above conversation feel familiar to you? Perhaps you’ve heard the same worries from a multitude of people over and over again?

They are concerned. They worry you are creating a narcissistic psychopath who is going to end up on the news all because he breastfed and co-slept until he was five. I get it, I really do. This fear is pushed on us from every which way. Independence is championed and our children will never gain that independence if we don’t push them towards it, right?

Well, no actually, this fear based belief is utterly wrong.

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