15 Things To Stop Doing To Yourself (And Your Children!)

What’s stopping you from fully enjoying parenting, and having the family life you deserve? We all fall in to habits that can be damaging to our relationships and our overall happiness from time to time, but habits are only habits as long as we let them continue.

Here is a list of habits it might be time to break:

1. Stop blaming yourself for mistakes. You had a bad day, you made a decision you regret, you shouted at your children and feel terrible now. Stop sitting in the guilt and move onwards and upwards. Apologise, wipe the slate clean and start again.

2. Stop worrying about the future and what will happen. Will they be smart, happy, healthy? The truth is, there is no way of knowing what will come your way. So stop worrying and get back in the now!

3. Stop comparing your family to someone else. That mum is not better than you, her children are not better than yours. They are just different. Look at yourself and your children as individuals and celebrate each one of you – just as you are!

4. Stop thinking you need the latest gadget, toy or holiday… you don’t, they don’t. Happiness is not found in the things we buy, or the things we own. It is the simple things that really matter.

5. Stop holding a grudge. You’ve had a bad moment, they have broken your favourite cup, whatever it is, it’s done, gone, in the past. Sulking, shouting or complaining won’t bring it back so don’t waste your time. Let it go, take a breath and find a way to laugh.

6. Stop forgetting to communicate. Just stop what you are doing, make eye contact, talk and above of all, listen.

7. Stop forgetting to savour those tiny moments that make it all worthwhile. There are so many, and you are missing them. Soak them up and enjoy those cuddles, those conversations, seeing your child discover something new as they explore the world with you by their side. Enjoy it.

8. Stop putting unimportant tasks first. Stop putting housework, busy work, and things that don’t matter in the grand scheme of things, ahead of taking the time to sit and cuddle and read a few stories with your child.

9. Stop trying to rush their childhood away. Weaning, sleeping through the night, learning to read… it’s all so exciting, but no more than what is happening right now, stop and pay attention!

10. Stop forgoing your own dreams. Being a parent doesn’t mean giving up on your passions. Find a way to live your dreams, and include your children on your journey. Having a thriving and vibrant role model will be nothing but beneficial to them.

11. Stop striving for perfection – it’s impossible and you’re wasting your time. Being a good parent is not about being perfect all the time, it’s about learning from your mistakes and deciding to act differently next time.

12. Stop accepting the rules of society without question. Do your own research, challenge what feels wrong to you, throw away the rules and make your own. Let your children do the same!

13. Stop trying to push them to be independent before they’re ready. The cuddles, the wanting to be with you, in your arms, comforted and reassured – these things are not a sign of weakness. Let go and relax in to it. Enjoy it. When they have had their needs met fully, they will branch out on their own to claim their independence, and you will have a hoard of wonderful memories to cherish.

14. Stop letting others tell you that you are doing it all wrong. Be confident in your choices and don’t feel that you have to explain yourself to the naysayers if you don’t want to.

15. Stop making a mountain out of a molehill. Accidents happen, they are rarely as catastrophic as we make out. Stop crying over spilled milk.

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4 thoughts on “15 Things To Stop Doing To Yourself (And Your Children!)”

  1. On first reading this seemed to be framed in the negative – “Stop” this, “Stop” that… But I love that each one is in fact a positive encouragement for what to “start” instead! Rooted in the everyday moments, real and do-able, love it 🙂 xxx

  2. I soooo needed this right now!! Thank you so much!! This things are all so important and although I know them I often forget about them…nice to be reminded!

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