Over the past 21 months, I have had the eye opening experience of being a parent to a child with a chronic medical condition. We have spent vast amounts of time as hospital inpatients, and as her voice I quickly learned how to advocate, speak up, protect and cocoon her from the potentially traumatic effects of being a “hospital baby.”
Together we have endured countless cannula placements, blood tests, surgeries, x rays, ultrasounds, lumber punctures and so much more. But through it all I have done my best to protect her, and though she has had to go through some very horrible experiences, she is (thankfully) always quick to bounce back.
In this article I want to share the lessons I have learned during the past two years, lessons which have saved our family and our daughter from unnecessary trauma and helped to give her the support she needed to come out of each hospital admission relatively untraumatised. These lessons can be transferred into any stressful situation, not just in a hospital environment, but whenever a child has to go through something which could potentially be very upsetting.
Continue reading Protecting Your Child from the Trauma of Medical Procedures.
**** This article was first published on www.samvickery.com ****
Have you ever been to a neonatal unit?
Prior to being transferred to the children’s ward, we spent several gruelling weeks with my daughter in neonatal.
I felt like I had been transported to an alien world. Everyone kept saying how wonderful it was, how amazing the care was and I admit, the nurses were (mostly) kind and caring. But a wonderful place?
I found it to be the most barbaric environment I have even been subjected to. A mother and her newborn are biologically programmed to need each other. Hormones are raging, the need to hold and touch your baby is all you can think of. And the last thing a sick baby needs is the stress of being separated from their mother. Kangaroo care works. Cuddles are truly healing.
Continue reading Inside the Barbaric World of a Neonatal Unit
A little teaser from my new novel THE PROMISE, which went live on Amazon today. Get your copy for the launch price of just 99p/$0.99 (this week only!) via the links below.
“Tim, please. I need this. I need him. It’s too late to change my mind, I can’t give him up. Please, just understand, can’t you?”
“But how can you love him so soon and so strong? I don’t get it.”
Saraya ran her fingers through Flynn’s fine hair, a smile forming on her lips. “Love isn’t something you can control or explain. It emerges from your soul and takes over your heart. I felt it the moment I held him in my arms and it has grown stronger every day since. Even when I feel like I love him more than I can bare, it continues to grow.”
She leaned forward and brushed a kiss over the baby’s downy forehead. Then she lifted her face meeting Tim’s eyes with her own. “The love of a mother for her child has no limit. It expands farther than the reaches of the universe. It is the most dangerous and wonderful feeling I have ever known.”
“Dangerous?” Tim repeated, his voice cautious. “Dangerous how?”
“Because there is nothing I wouldn’t do to keep him from harm Tim. Nothing. I used to have the ability to reason, to water down my reactions for the sake of being polite or minding someone’s feelings. Not anymore. I can feel it, this new depth to my capabilities. It’s reckless but it’s undeniable. I mean it when I say I would do anything. It must be the oldest instinct in the world, that of a mother protecting her child. I feel as though a grizzly bear wouldn’t have a chance against me if he tried to take him from me.” She looked at Tim, a fierce glint in her eyes challenging him to make her prove it.
Available worldwide. Paperback coming soon!
“Beautiful, profound and from the heart. The Promise shows a depth of character development beyond that of standard ‘women’s fiction’, and offers readers a journey into what it means to love selflessly, completely, and what truly makes a mother – biological or otherwise.”
“I read this book in one sitting, I couldn’t put it down. There were points I could barely breathe due to the raw emotions I was feeling for the characters. I cried and I even found myself wanting another baby (!!) to relive the moments so beautifully written about in the promise. Well worth a read. Excellent.”
“This is a wonderfully written book, full of confronting emotions. It was an easy read, with a depth to the narrative that was enticing.”
“You cannot put this book down!”
“From the first chapter I was gripped. It is beautifully written and the characters are brought to life that you feel like you know them like your friends by the end of the novel.”
“I thoroughly enjoyed the book and it was definitely a page turner.”
When it comes to having a new baby, you can guarantee that people are going to want to come and meet your little son or daughter the moment they are born. This can be a blessing or it can be hugely stressful, so in this article I’m going to share my best tips on how to deal with post baby visitors.
Boundaries – Some mothers crave the busyness and love visitors, some are exhausted and just want to snuggle. Listen to your instincts and be strong in telling people when it’s time to go (or not to come at all). It is OK to have a babymoon and refuse visitors for a week or two if that is what you would prefer.
Continue reading 8 ways To Cope With Visitors After Having a Baby
When a new baby comes in to your family, the sudden impact on your usual sleep habits can come as a huge shock. It is not uncommon for parents to feel totally exhausted and too fatigued to continue on in their regular routines.
Many experience feeling burned out and are surprised at how much of a struggle parenting this tiny little person can be.
Continue reading How To Cope With New Parent Exhaustion