Tag Archives: Family

It’s Easy to be a Peaceful Parent… When Nothing Stressful Happens!

newborn-1506248_1920Stress. It’s something we all experience at some point or another. For mothers of young children, teens, multiples, home educating families or families parenting children with medical issues, to name just a few, the stress levels can increase exponentially.

When there is nothing more challenging than choosing which bagel topping to have for lunch or what film to watch on Netflix, it is easy to be calm. But the more balls thrown into our ever juggling arms, the more our stress levels can rise.

Our children are like sponges, soaking up our moods, be they calm or fraught. And when it is the latter, their own stress levels rise to match our own. They reflect it right back at you, no matter how hard you try to hide what you are feeling. You cannot mask your true mood from them.

They know.

They know you so deeply, they see through the false smile. And when they mirror that stress, absorbing all that tension, their behaviour descends into mayhem. They have to release it. A calm, serene child has little need to lash out and be destructive. They have no urge to argue or shout furiously in response to your requests. But when their insides are pulsing with pent up tension, mounting stress, they have to let it out.

They have to explode.

And it is the worst possible thing for us weary, drained parents. We are balancing on the edge of patience at all times. We are so close to reaching our absolute limit. We can’t manage a single extra challenge. And we are suddenly faced with a child who neither knows nor cares that we are hovering at breaking point, who is lashing out, needing support we can’t summon up the reserves to give.

This is parenting at its hardest. This is when things fall apart and we react in ways we later regret. When we ignore feelings, when we say harsh words or forget how scary it can feel to be lost in such big emotions when you are so very small. It all becomes just a step too far for us to manage.

It’s so easy to talk about the merits of peaceful parenting. It’s all so wonderful in theory. But is it really possible to be the parent you so desperately want to be in these times of undeniable stress?

Fortunately, the answer is yes. But it’s not easy. It’s not going to come without hard work. But it is worth it. Let me share how with you now.

Continue reading It’s Easy to be a Peaceful Parent… When Nothing Stressful Happens!

A Little Teaser…

The Promise (full without textA little teaser from my new novel THE PROMISE, which went live on Amazon today. Get your copy for the launch price of just 99p/$0.99 (this week only!) via the links below.

EXCERPT:

“Tim, please. I need this. I need him. It’s too late to change my mind, I can’t give him up. Please, just understand, can’t you?”

“But how can you love him so soon and so strong? I don’t get it.”

Saraya ran her fingers through Flynn’s fine hair, a smile forming on her lips. “Love isn’t something you can control or explain. It emerges from your soul and takes over your heart. I felt it the moment I held him in my arms and it has grown stronger every day since. Even when I feel like I love him more than I can bare, it continues to grow.”

She leaned forward and brushed a kiss over the baby’s downy forehead. Then she lifted her face meeting Tim’s eyes with her own. “The love of a mother for her child has no limit. It expands farther than the reaches of the universe. It is the most dangerous and wonderful feeling I have ever known.”

“Dangerous?” Tim repeated, his voice cautious. “Dangerous how?”

“Because there is nothing I wouldn’t do to keep him from harm Tim. Nothing. I used to have the ability to reason, to water down my reactions for the sake of being polite or minding someone’s feelings. Not anymore. I can feel it, this new depth to my capabilities. It’s reckless but it’s undeniable. I mean it when I say I would do anything. It must be the oldest instinct in the world, that of a mother protecting her child. I feel as though a grizzly bear wouldn’t have a chance against me if he tried to take him from me.” She looked at Tim, a fierce glint in her eyes challenging him to make her prove it.

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Available worldwide. Paperback coming soon!

 

Early reviews:

“Beautiful, profound and from the heart. The Promise shows a depth of character development beyond that of standard ‘women’s fiction’, and offers readers a journey into what it means to love selflessly, completely, and what truly makes a mother – biological or otherwise.”

“I read this book in one sitting, I couldn’t put it down. There were points I could barely breathe due to the raw emotions I was feeling for the characters. I cried and I even found myself wanting another baby (!!) to relive the moments so beautifully written about in the promise. Well worth a read. Excellent.”

“This is a wonderfully written book, full of confronting emotions. It was an easy read, with a depth to the narrative that was enticing.”

“You cannot put this book down!”

“From the first chapter I was gripped. It is beautifully written and the characters are brought to life that you feel like you know them like your friends by the end of the novel.”

“I thoroughly enjoyed the book and it was definitely a page turner.”

 

 

 

A Tribute to a Wonderful Father

20150325_092624Today you were up before the sun. You kissed our five year little boy who was snuggled in bed beside you, kissed me goodbye, though I could barely open my eyes and headed outside into a howling gale to cycle the forty minute journey to a job that you don’t love.

You called me on your lunch-break.

You asked after the children and checked on how I was doing. You offered to buy something I needed from the supermarket so that I didn’t have to get the children there for one thing. You made time in that precious one hour break from your desk to talk to our son about what he had been doing during the morning.

You went back to the desk and you worked hard. I know this because you never do things by halves.

You emerged back into the wind and rain and made the forty minute cycle back home again.

Continue reading A Tribute to a Wonderful Father

12 Little Ways You’re Getting It Right as a Parent

We parents can be harsh on ourselves sometimes, and so often we have a tendency to focus on where we’re going wrong. This can be useful if we think of constructive ways to improve and do better for our children, but more often than not, it pulls us into a guilt trip that makes us forget the great parent we are the majority of the time, and how much effort we put into getting it right for our children.

So in this post I want to give you some reasons to remind you exactly why YOU ARE a great parent. Don’t ever forget it!

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An Unschooling Week – How Natural, Passionate, Interest Led Learning Occurs

I get a lot of people asking how our son can learn through unschooling. Am I qualified to teach him all he needs to know? How does learning happen without set lesson plans in place? Well it occurred to me that the best way to explain how natural, passionate, interest led learning occurs, was just to simply show you a little of our week. You see, where learning is concerned, every day is different and opportunities to learn can be found in almost everything we do. So here is a look at what we have been doing (and learning!) this week…

Continue reading An Unschooling Week – How Natural, Passionate, Interest Led Learning Occurs

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